White Skin Privilege

                  Our generation didn't build the house of racism,

                   but we are living in it and reaping its benefits.

Two Mental Shifts Required

Growing up in white culture feels normal because it’s the “norm.” It’s the majority culture where everything good is white. Our Christian religion is whitewashed: God is thought of as white. Jesus is pictured as much lighter than he likely was, and Mary is white. Until recently our fairy tales only had white characters, our movies and TV shows were largely white as were our superheroes. Our textbooks have been sanitized with the omission of black history and the contribution of blacks in 

forging our nation. Our government officials, bankers, teachers and professors, toy dolls, and cartoons—you guessed it—are all mostly white.

You only have to look around to see that the world white people live in is exclusively designed to meet our needs and to help us feel comfortable in a society where whites have many privileges for no other reason than we were fortunate enough to be born with white skin.

How in the world will this inequity and inequality ever change? Many have asked this question for eons for the truth is, regardless of their color, people don’t like to give up power. It’s just that in our world, the powerful are almost exclusively white. So, what would make a white person want to share their power? As a member of the privileged class of “white,” what would motivate a white person to stand up and take action to begin to level the playing field?

That degree of motivation requires two mental shifts in perspective. The first mental shift is owning our white privilege. This is a tall order for many white individuals. First of all, there are many types of privilege: health, wealth, being male, intelligence, physical attraction, access to good education, having an intact family system, and others. It’s unusual for anyone to be able to check the boxes of all these types of privilege, so when a white individual is first confronted with the concept of “white privilege,” they may recoil as their brain begins to log all the ways in which they are not privilege. For example, a healthy white male who comes from an impoverished family with alcohol addiction, who has had to make his way through the world largely on his own might argue that his life has certainly not been one of privilege. Or a white female who has struggled with health issues that have limited numerous opportunities throughout her whole life might flatly deny that she has ever been privileged.

So the intersection of privileges, the different combinations of privilege or lack of them, can greatly influence an individual’s perception of their own level of privilege. Of course, this is as true for black individuals as it is for whites.

But here’s the difference. No one who is white has grown up being judged by the color of their skin. White skin is the greatest privilege of all. All other privileges are downgraded if you have black skin.

White take their white skin privilege for granted because it’s just “the way it’s always been.” So we tend to accept it not only as the norm, but also perhaps as the way it should be.

The first mental shift takes place when a white person can recognize and own the privilege afforded them because of their white skin. It can be hard because perhaps it brings up feelings of guilt. It can be hard because you feel like you are being judged as having an unfair advantage (and you do). It can be difficult because you know how hard you have worked and how much you have had to overcome in your life. There are powerful internal forces that push against entertaining that your white skin has given you an unfair advantage in life and that you have benefitted greatly from something as ridiculous as the color of your skin.

It’s not easy to acknowledge white privilege. We find it offensive and it kind of makes us feel dirty. As white people, we’re not used to feeling like that. We want to be able to take credit for our accomplishments and station in life, so we get defensive when we feel as though we’re being judged for the color of our skin. Well guess what—that may be the first time you’ve ever felt like you were judged for being white. Welcome to the life of blackness where you experience multiple times a day for your entire life!!

It takes courage and honesty to acknowledge white privilege because once you see it, you can’t unsee it. It creates internal conflict because the world you thought you knew is now viewed through a different lens. The way you see yourself is now seen through a different lens. That’s a big change and most folks don’t like change, especially something of this magnitude.

For the purposes of this article, let’s assume that as a white person you have come to recognize and accept your white privilege as a reality. You see it clearly but you don’t know what to do about it and very well might think there’s nothing you can do about it other than feel guilty. Guilt rarely serves as a positive motivator.

This is the point at which a second mental shift is required. The second mental shift is acknowledging how we are unknowing enabling racism to continue in our society through our silence. We are complicit by accepting the inequality. Ouch! That one really stings. How dare anyone suggest that a nice, white person, especially one who has come to the point of recognizing their white privilege, would somehow be supporting racism?

In many ways, our society functions as a zero-sum game—there are winners and there are losers. We have difficulty with the concept of cooperation through sharing because our capitalist system is founded upon competition. And with all competition, there are always losers. Blacks are by far the biggest losers in our society. They lose in competition for wealth, housing, education, legal representation, entrepreneurship, and healthcare. Sadly, our nation was founded on powerful whites benefitting economically from the labor of blacks. That pattern has not changed as the dominant white culture continues to reap the benefits of a disempowered black population.

So how is a white person complicit in maintaining racist policies and racist systems? Once you recognize that you have white privilege and the unfairness of that privilege, you are supporting it if you do nothing about it but continue reap the benefits of it. This is the meaning behind the slogan, “silence is violence.”

Allowing something to continue, that you benefit from and know is wrong, is being complicit in its continuance. Without the recognition of complicity, there is no reason for most white people to feel responsible in any way for the current racial inequity and inequality. They can feel sorry for slavery and console themselves by knowing that they didn’t create this system of inequality. That perspectives absolves them of any wrongdoing—until they can see their complicity. 

As mentioned previously, people rarely give up power willingly and without strong motivation. However, when complicity is acknowledged by someone with white skin, an uncomfortable cognitive dissonance is created. The prior self-image of a nice, white person becomes tarnished by the undeniable hypocrisy in a stated belief of equality for all but a life that supports the opposite. The good news is that this internal conflict can open a door by creating an opportunity for a shift in perspective. That shift can lead to positive actions that stand against, rather than inadvertently support racism.

Personally, the recognition of my complicity changed my entire view of my responsibility for addressing the inequity. I prided myself on not being racist and being supportive of equality. It was truly a shock to discover that I was contributing to the poison within our culture by happily benefitting from my white privilege. On one hand, I was certainly aware of the racial disparities; on the other hand, I did not feel compelled to lift a hand to do anything about it because I did not feel responsible for it. Once I recognized my complicity, I claimed my responsibility and changed my life.

If you have the courage to recognize your white privilege and your complicity through silence, I urge you to educate yourself by listening to podcasts, reading books and articles, get in a discussion group or a book club where racism is discussed. There are so many ways to take action by standing against racism. You can have honest and open discussions with the people in your life about these issues, open your wallet and contribute to organizations that support black initiatives, write a blog, support black businesses, pull people to the side when you hear racist comments or microaggressions that they’re not aware they are engaging in.

I’m just at a beginning stage of awareness and education. We are all where we are but we don’t have to stay there. We can evolve. Let’s do it!

I have a doctorate in counseling psychology and have been a psychotherapist for 35 years. My work is grounded in healing trauma, releasing old patterns and beliefs that no longer serve, and cultivating new behaviors that allow clients to thrive.  stevensmithpsychologist.com

I am also an author of a book based on 5 life-enhancing principles, titled, “Living Your Best: A Powerful Blueprint for Personal Transformation.”   https://stevensmith-author.com/