The caretaker was excited too, because poppies were among her most cherished flowers. As she went about meticulously planting each seed in a separate pot, she discovered to her dismay that there was not enough of the rich, loamy soil for both. Having already planted the white seed, she was eager to finish her task. Impatience overtook her. Rather than wait until she could purchase more potting soil, she went out to her yard and dug up some dirt that was heavy with clay. She broke it up as best she could, but it was obviously a very different environment for the black seed. There were two adjacent windows in this particular room and she sat the white seed facing south and the black seed facing west.

Everything seemed fine at first. The caretaker dutifully watered both seeds and each could feel the stirrings of life within. Over time, they began to grow and were soon working their way up toward the crust of the soil above them. It wasn’t easy navigating through the air pockets in the soil, but they were very excited because they were in the process of becoming what they were meant to be. Their journey of expansion filled them with an excited anticipation about what lay ahead in their evolution to maturity.

One day, the black seed finally broke the surface of its soil and it was elated! It was proud of itself because the process had taken a tremendous amount of effort and energy. But as it gazed in the direction of the white seed, it was very shocked to see that it was already 3 inches tall! “Wow, how did you grow so fast?” the black seed asked.

“I don’t know,” said the white seed. “I’ve been above soil for quite a while and I was beginning to wonder if you were even going to make it. Why did it take you so long?”

“I have no idea. I was trying my best.”

That conversation left the black seed feeling sad and doubting itself. Was it inferior to the white seed? Was it defective in some way? Maybe it wasn’t trying hard enough.

As time went on, the black seed became more observant. It began to notice differences that had not been obvious before. It was now tall enough to peer over at the white seed and could tell that the soil looked different than its own. It noticed that because of the richer soil that the white seed was rooted in, that the caretaker was able to give it more water because it could absorb it. Meanwhile, the black seed received much less water because of the clay-laden soil, which absorbed the water much more slowly.

“Hey, are your roots getting plenty of water and oxygen?” asked the black seed.

“Oh yeah, every day! Why do you ask?”

“Because I’m having a hard time. It seems like your soil is better than mine. Water and oxygen can’t easily get to my roots. No wonder I’m having such a hard time keeping up with you.”

“I’ve never really paid much attention to your soil, but now that you mention it, I can see it’s different.”

“Well, that’s not fair!” cried the black seed.

“Probably not, but it is what it is,” replied the white seed. “I feel sorry for you but there’s nothing I can do about it so don’t blame me.”

And the conversation ended there.

Over the next few weeks, stark differences were now evident in the foliage and growth of the two plants. The white seed was flourishing and had begun to sprout buds. It was so excited as it awaited the blossoming of its beautiful flowers! It felt very good about its accomplishments and was clearly on the way to reaching its potential. On the other hand, the black seed was crestfallen. Even though it knew that its shortcomings were because of the discrepancy in treatment that it was receiving, it was really hard not to blame itself.

The black seed was angry and felt powerless to change its circumstances. It had started to track the amount of sunlight each received and noticed another glaring variation. Facing the south, the white seed received significantly more sunlight while the black seed only garnered the late afternoon and setting sun.

Finally, the anger reached a boiling point. “I’m really angry,” said the black seed. “I try and try but I simply can’t keep up with you and I don’t even have any buds yet.”

The white seed, while feeling some compassion for the black seed, felt some initial stirrings of disdain and guilt. “You know, I think you just need to try harder,” said the white seed. “You don’t know how hard I’ve worked to get here and I feel like I deserve all that I’ve earned.”

“Yeah, but don’t you see all the advantages you’ve had?” complained the black seed—better soil, more water, and copious amount of sunshine. I’ve not had the same opportunities as you.”

Feeling defensive, the white seed replied, “Look, it’s not my fault and we all have to deal with the cards we’re dealt. I don’t want to feel guilty because you’ve had some hurdles that I’ve not. I feel sorry for you, dude, but it’s not my fault!”

The white seed’s response only added to the black seed’s self-doubt and downward spiral of depression. Maybe the white seed was right. Had it not tried hard enough to reach its potential? Was it lazy and not working hard enough?

In the end, the black seed developed two destructive patterns. It could either blame others for its fate or it could blame itself. The white seed, in response, could either choose to be in denial, see the disparity and look the other way, or blame the black seed for its shortcomings. Those dynamics put a great strain on the relationship these two seeds had with each other. They rarely spoke anymore.

                                                                 *********

Black and white poppy seeds really are a thing, but this allegory is about something much, much bigger. The disparity in opportunity, environments, and advantages that white people enjoy is irrefutable and it is systemic. It exists in our educational, legal, banking, housing, and economic systems. Are you okay with that? If so, why?

Some would reply to that by acknowledging that it’s an unfair system, but absolve themselves of responsibility for the disparity. That would be the white seed’s response. But here’s the thing: even though our current generation of white people did not build the house of racism, we are living in it and enjoying many advantages because of it. Are you okay with that?

Guilt is a very unpleasant emotion—one that many white people feel when this conversation comes up. Being told that you have advantages because of the color of your white skin can feel like an attack on your personhood, an attack on something you’re not responsible for—your skin color. Feeling blamed and feeling guilt are not pleasant for anyone so as a defense, we often shrug our shoulders and check out of the conversation. Feeling powerless to change the situation, we avoid the issue. Powerlessness doesn’t feel good either. However, white people do have power. In fact, we have almost all of it. So, what can we do with our advantages, our privilege, to begin to dismantle systemic racism?

A few things we can immediately do on an individual level:

• speak up when we hear racist comments in a discussion
• have conversations about white privilege and racial disparity with our family and friends
• educate ourselves about systemic racism so we can see how pervasive it is
• post what we learn and post articles in support of racial equity and equality through our social media network
• purchase from black-owned businesses

Changing systemic racism is a huge task and can feel overwhelming on an individual level, even if your heart is fully in favor of an equitable society. Take small steps because every step you take is significant. Every action toward a love-based paradigm has a positive impact. You won’t always see the impact of those small steps, but if there’s a positive shift in your consciousness, you create a shift in another. Then the dominoes of racism begins to fall.

Be a love-based domino!